Don't be the guy in the grocery store the midnight before Valentine's Day getting cheap flowers.

WHEN I NEED groceries, I find it best to go after work. For those that don’t know, I usually leave the office around midnight. When it’s that late at night, the 24-hour grocery store right around the corner of our house is usually pretty empty. Well, I was in there tonight fulfilling about a 10-item list – it was like any other late-night trip. Well, almost.

It just so happens that this particular trip fell the night before Valentine’s Day. And, of course, this being a grocery store, they went a little wild with the pink balloons, cheap roses/carnations, boxes of chocolates and poorly made stuffed bears. Not surprising, really. But what was surprising was the amount of men in there getting – literally – last-minute gifts for their wives and girlfriends for the next day’s holiday.

I mean, really, fellas? Is that the best you can do? Grocery store flowers bought at midnight the night before? Surely, I hope their women aren’t the only aspects of their lives that receive such little forethought.

Men, I tell you … that is the No. 1 way to fail Valentine’s Day. Here are nine more ways to fail big-time on Valentine’s Day. Avoid making these mistakes, and you just might be in for the night of your life.

• Arrive late: Showing up late lets your date know just where she falls on your priority list. The bottom line, you know you’re going to be late well before you’re actually late. If there’s a situation where you know you can’t make it on time, give her a call and let her know. Do that, and it’ll feel more like a slight change in plans rather than you just blowing it by not getting to her door on time.

• Show up under dressed: You’ve heard of the old office saying “Don’t dress for the job you have, dress for the job you want.” Well, the same can be applied to dating. Now, don’t go overboard. Don’t wear a tux for dinner and a show if it’s not called for. However, don’t take her to see La Boheme wearing khakis and a polo.

• Show up empty-handed: It’s also key to remember that this isn’t just a regular date. That would be like saying the Super Bowl is just another football game. This is a big event for her, and it should be for you too. A token, even a temporary one (like flowers) is called for. Even if she says “No gifts needed this year,” what she means by that is no expensive jewelry. Even if you have a no-gift pact this year, getting her a card and some flowers doesn’t break that rule.

• Show up without a plan: No woman wants her Valentine’s Day date to start with the same “So, what’ya up for tonight?” that she might hear on a random Tuesday evening. By the time you reach her door, know what you’re going to do that night, and make sure it’s something she will find fun. Do that, and you very well may reap the rewards later.

• Forget to complement: The second you see her on Valentine’s Day, it’s like a massive unveiling for her. Everything she did to get ready – her hair, her makeup, her outfit – was to impress you. Make sure she knows it has.

• Head to the restaurant without a reservation: So you’re planning on going to your favorite restaurant, and you’ve never needed a reservation before? Well, this ain’t your typical weekend. When you get to the restaurant, you’d better have made a reservation. And if you’re planning on taking her to a place that “doesn’t do” reservations on Valentine’s Day, well then perhaps you shouldn’t be taking your date to Denny’s on such an occasion.

• Talk about (the wrong) Valentine’s Days past: This one is mainly for the V-Day first-timers. If this is your 40^th Valentine’s Day with the same woman, by all means talk about the great years past. However, if this is you and your lady’s first one together, try to avoid talking about the miseries (or triumphs) of previous years. It’s simply classless.

• Eat too much: Admit it, there’s nothing better than going out to a nice restaurant, eating your fill and sinking into the couch when you get home for a night in front of the tube. However, in reiteration, this isn’t your typical night out. You don’t have to eat like a bird, but don’t over-stuff. You may need to be light on your feet a little later.

• Go (obviously) cheap: Some women just love what others may think to be “typical” or “cliche” gifts for Valentine’s Day. Maybe your lady just loves a new stuffed teddy bear, heart-shaped box of chocolates and pink-iced cookies for V-Day. If that’s the case, then by all means give her what she wants. But don’t take your good fortune to mean that you can just stop into a corner drug store and get all your Valentine’s Day shopping done in less than two minutes. There’s a difference between not expensive and cheap. She likes chocolate? Go for Ghirardelli instead of the store brand; it’s only a few bucks more. She wants a plush bear? Don’t pick up the one at the check-out counter next to the gum and candy bars, instead pony up the extra $10 for a quality one from a department store. She wants cookies? Don’t go for the ones in the grocery store in the plastic box by the dozen; for about the same price, you can get two gourmet cookies from your local bakery.