Long-term stress needs a long-term solution.
For the types of stress that come from lingering situations, often the quick-fix stress relievers just won’t cut it. Sure, getting in a good workout can clear your mind when the pieces of an immediate project just don’t seem to come together. But what about the slow, grinding stress that life can throw at you? You’re in a dead-end job with no end in sight; you’ve decided to go back to school, but there’s just no money to pay for it. That kind of stress. For that, there are a few “do it later” fix-its that you can use to bring down your blood pressure a little:
DO IT LATER
1. MAKE A LIST: Men love lists, right? Suppose you’re at Point A, and you want to be at Point B. The thing is, you have no idea how you’re going to get there. But I’ll bet there’s one thing you can do. Get out a good old pad and pen. Yes, a pen. Pencils are for those who are unsure. Now, at random, jot down everything it’s going to take to get you from your current situation to reach your goal. Everything. Right down to buying the packing tape if your plan involves a move. When you’re done, look … you have a how-to list to reach your goal. Fold it up, and tuck it in your pocket. When things start to get at you, pull out your list. Remember, you’ve got a strategy now.
2. PUT THAT LIST IN ORDER: Having the list is great. But it can only take you so far. After you’ve gotten your bearings, it’s time for you to turn that list into a plan of action. Another thing a man loves … rankings. Now, this isn’t the NCAA Top 25, as it may take a little more interpretation. You’re not going to rank the items in your list from biggest and baddest down to the most mundane. I’ve found that the best way to order such a list is easiest first. Take that list and order it in a way so that you can go ahead and knock out the first few items right away. Are you making that life-changing move across the country? Go ahead and put “buy boxes” right at the top. You’re going to have to buy them eventually. Why not make it now? The folded boxes in the corner will serve as a reminder not to get sidetracked. Perhaps your goal has a little more to do with timing. In that case, order your list chronologically. Put first the items that you need to get taken care of right away. In this case, you’ll have an easy-to-follow checklist. Now that you know what to do, knock it out.
3. DETAILS, DETAILS, DETAILS: I know I may be beating you over the head with this list idea, but so much of life can be accomplished by adding in a little more organization. It’s time to describe to yourself just how certain items on your list are going to get ticked off. Sure, “Get a job in California” might be a one-step entry on your overall list, but there’s more to it than that. It’s time to elaborate a little more on each step to your plan. Under some of the more hard-to-achieve tasks on your list, add in sub-entries about the steps you need to take to make that massive step. In the aforementioned example, sub-entries might include: A: Update resume; B: Identify target companies; C: Identify individuals who need to receive your information; D: Prepare for possible travel to target company’s location (check out flight prices, rental cars, accommodations). You’re sub-entries can be as detailed as you want … they might even include how much postage you’ll need to ship out all of your resumes. After this step, you’ve got a more detailed approach about how to achieve your overall goal.
4. ESCAPE TO FICTION: When dealing with such long-term goals, surely you can’t be expected to tackle something major every day. Baseball players play 162 games a season, the most in major American sports — and even they don’t play every day. Even Cal Ripken Jr. had days when the O’s didn’t take the field. Sometimes those days weren’t even planned — rainouts. From time to time, it’s helpful to have your own rainout. Escape into a book; re-read The Great Gatsby. Go see a movie; rent a movie — something epic, like Gladiator. Hell, if it’s your thing, watch a marathon of South Park. You’re dealing with a long-term goal that’s going to take a long-going solution. You can afford to take a few hours to totally forget … just for a while.
5. RECRUIT A SUPPORT TEAM: Sure, there might be a few times when something like this needs to be taken care of all alone. But, when you are really honest with yourself, there aren’t many of those situations. Most of the time, many of your closest friends are likely to know anyway, right? Since they already know, let them in on your plan. You’ve been there for them in the past, right? It may be time for you to lean on them — if only for support. Let them know your plan. You never know when one of them might say, “You know, I have a cousin who works there. He should be able to get your resume bumped to the top of the pile.”
Now you have a basic plan on how to tackle most types of stress. But each situation can sometimes call for a specific plan of attack. I’m not here to offer you definitive information — just advice, one man to another. If there’s a stressful situation overshadowing your life, and you can’t recruit your own support team, send an inquiry to the mailbag and I’ll use my own experiences and expertise to do anything I can to help you.
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