I WAS still hours away from being a dad when I learned my first (and a very valuable) lesson: Don’t leave anything on your to-do list when your wife could go into labor at any moment.

First, here’s a little background info:

My wife and I were taking on a big chunk of life all at once this month. We were, of course, having our first child (herein to be referred to as Little Swiz) in addition to moving across the country (which also came with the side tasks of renting out our condo and finding a place to live after the 3,000-mile relocation) and I was starting a new job (that represented a very different direction in my career). And we were trying to get all that done in a few weeks.

Damn.

My wife was full term, and we were actually one day past our due date. However, her OB was already talking like the labor might have to be induced. She was trying to feel us out about whether we wanted to wait one week or two weeks after the due date for induction. In quick summation, we were thinking we had “plenty” more time to get a few things done before heading to the hospital. So, we went to bed the night of July 4 thinking we were going to be able to knock off a few items from that aforementioned to-do list the next day. Most important were a few little things. Our property management company had scheduled a few showings for our condo on the 5^th. We had to do a few things to get the place ready. Things like take out the trash, move a few boxes out of the living room and into the shed out back and just some general tidy-up business. All-in-all, about 15 minutes of work. It could have easily been knocked out before bed. But it wasn’t. We crashed out, leaving these few minor things for the morning.

But before I awoke that morning, my wife stirred me at 5:05 a.m. with the words “my water broke.”

Time to go to the hospital.

Luckily, we had packed our hospital bags a few days before. But with our condo being looked at by potential renters later that day, we couldn’t just leave the tidying up undone. So, while my wife was preparing herself for labor, I’m running around taking out the trash, moving boxes and frantically cleaning up what I can.

Sure, it wasn’t a harrowing experience. But it did add an element of stress to a situation that didn’t need any more than it already came with.

So, my first fatherly advice to any dads-to-be: When it gets close to game time, go to bed each night ready to take off for the hospital at a moment’s notice because that may be all you get.

There’s overpaid and then there’s REALLY overpaid.

To say that England football boss Fabio Capello is stealing money from the folks who pay his nearly £10 million per year salary is like saying early European settlers kind of dicked over Native Americans.

Capello, whose Three Lions once again disappointed English fans the world over with another lackluster World Cup performance, makes £5.8 millon more annually than the second-highest paid national team manager, Italy’s Marcello Lippi.

And yes, I’m ashamed to use the Lippi and Capello surnames in the same sentence considering Italy is — at the time of this writing — the defending World Cup champion with Lippi leading the way.

If England had gone down fighting or if the gaffer had tried injecting new blood into a lineup many thought was already getting stale four years ago, Capello’s salary might not be such a big deal.

But his pay is just shocking. Has he been signed to some kind of lifetime contract we don’t know about? Will he be taping Aaron Lennon’s ankles in 2014 as a form of retribution for leaving Lennon to rot on the bench during this World Cup? Will he serve as Wayne Rooney’s water boy and launder Peter Crouch’s sweaty kit in four years (if Crouch gets on the pitch that is, which he didn’t in 2010)?

This much I know: If Capello does return to England’s team, it shouldn’t be as a manager. His missteps as Three Lions boss — either real or perceived — are too many to mention in this space, but suffice it to say that he didn’t seem to do anything more than a man on the street with even a cursory knowledge of England’s team could’ve done.

He used mostly the same players in essentially the same formation the English team has been using for years and got the same result — an early exit from another World Cup. No fresh approach, no new ideas and honestly, no testicular fortitude.

I suppose those who follow England, like me, should have seen it coming, but I guess the millions of pounds Capello makes blinded us.

NOTE: Financial figures taken from just-football.com

There’s certainly no shortage of World Cup predictions out there these days, so I’m not about to bore you, dear reader, with yet another one.

However, I do have some thoughts on the upcoming tournament in South Africa and while I’ve already shared many of these gems with strangers and friends in any number of bars the last few months, my insights — be they brilliant or simply dross — have yet to be written down.

Until now.

Here are five things I’m predicting will happen in the next month of World Cup games — some good, some bad, some weird, some illegal. Enjoy.

1. People who didn’t like football before the Cup won’t like it during and/or after.

Which is just fine. It’s the most popular sport in the world. There are plenty of fans. I don’t think we need more.

2. Football supporters will get into arguments with non-supporters about the appeal of the game.

Again, I support this. I only hope that some of these disagreements escalate into dudes wearing Fernando Torres or Wayne Rooney shirts kicking the shit out of dudes wearing Tony Romo or Eli Manning shirts. And yes, I own the Spain Torres shirt. Bring it on, you Dallas Cowboy rednecks.

3. There will be a handful of truly special goals scored.

I predict these goals will be scored by one or all of the following: Lionel Messi (easy choice), the aforementioned Torres, Steven Gerrard (who needs to reaffirm his status as a world class player), Edson Buddle (star on the rise), Clint Dempsey (as someone was quoted in his Sports Illustrated feature: “(Dempsey) just tries shit”), Didier Drogba (broken arm and all) and Thierry Henry (preferably without using either hand, or just one of his hands twice).

4. Diego Maradona will do something worthy of worldwide headlines.

This could be the result of him leading Argentina to another Cup, or the result of him getting busted with two South African prostitutes and an ounce of narcotics. I’m cool with either scenario. Messi, Tevez and company are fun to watch.

5. Everyone will forget about the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico.

“GOOOOOOOAAAAAALLLLLLL!” exclaimed British Petroleum executives.

Pictures from my roadtrip:

Which shoes would you wear?

SO you’ve just added a classic navy blue suit to your business repertoire, but now you’re wondering what shoes would go best with it. While black shoes are the way to go with almost any suit (except brown), more and more you’ll find that men of style are opting for brown shoes with their navy blue suits.

There are a few things you should keep in mind when selecting your footwear.

Brown seems to be the more fashion forward choice. As in, it seems to be the choice you’ll want to make if it’s your job to stand out. Black, however, is still the classic and more conservative choice. One pundit put it nicely, “Wear black shoes if you’re seeking a job, and wear brown shoes if you’re seeking a date.” Another said to “wear the black shoes if you have a boss, and wear the brown shoes if you are the boss.”

One thing is certain … brown shoes are no longer a total no-no with a blue suit. Basically, it comes down to a combination of your personal preference and your situation.

What are your thoughts? With your blue suit, do you wear brown or black shoes?

THE DAY is quickly approaching when I’ll start my new gig. This new job had a specific set of qualifications, and I meet or exceed them all.  It’s got a list of recommended skills, and I have all those too. I was vetted, interviewed and offered the position with all the confidence that I’ll be able to meet or exceed the standards for success set for the position. I’ll start very soon, and I know I can handle myself.

I’m not worried a bit … about that job.

But there’s another job I’m about to start, and it didn’t come with a predefined list of qualifications and skills. It didn’t come with anyone to interview me and make sure I was up to the task. Nope, some time in early July, I’ll be handed my new title and given my raw materials and told to get to it.

That first job, well, like I said, I’m plenty qualified. That second job, here’s hoping. And it’s the more important one, too. For that second job comes with the title of “Dad.”

My wife and I were married in October of 2009, and we honeymooned in New Orleans — a city we both love a great deal. Well, we came back from that honeymoon with a few T-shirts, a necklace for my wife, a bunch of memories and a baby in my wife’s belly.

Yeah, on the honeymoon. So that transition from newlyweds to parents-to-be was indeed a quick one. We had planned all along to start right away, but we had no idea it would “take” on the very first try!

That “other” new job is legit, too. It’s my first management position, and from where we’ll live it’ll be about a 50-minute commute. But here’s the big thing … it’s 3,000 miles from where we live now.

A little more history: My wife’s a West Coaster and I’m an East Coaster … from the South. Until now, we’ve lived on the West Coast — just north of San Francisco. We’re both writers for the same newspaper, but I’ve just accepted a new job eastside. My new employers knew from Day 1 about my family situation, which has been a big help in making the decision to go ahead and accept. Accept, that is, the challenge of moving my family (newborn baby in tow) across the country and starting a new job all at the same time.

What really made the icing sweeter on the cake was the fact that the new job was right back in an area that I am very familiar with both professionally and personally.

So, here’s the intro to the Fatherhood Blog portion of The Man F.A.Q., but the real action will begin in early July (due date is July 4). Until then, I’ll mostly be writing about our preparations to be new parents and to move across the country.

You’ll be seeing our life through my eyes — a work-in-an-office dad who’s got an hour’s commute to work each day. Hopefully you’ll be able to learn from (or at least be able to chuckle at) my mistakes or even any triumphs that I may stumble into along the way.

This was a forward from one of our East Coast media guru buddies. It’s a music video, and we’re not exactly sure what the song is about. In fact, we don’t remember hearing any actual music.

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If this doesn’t get you jacked up for the World Cup — which starts next month with USA taking on England in the group stage kick-off — then you’re probably just not a sports fan. Even people who hate football/soccer should be able to get up for this:

The Opera Poker Set ($499)

LET’S FACE IT, men like to go all in. Whether it’s their clothes, their cars or their women — they want the best. When a man invites his buddies over for the weekly poker game, the same applies. Nobody wants to go to the guy’s house who brings out the plastic chips from the supermarket and the flimsy cards.

If a man is to host poker night, he must do it right. And that starts with the poker set.

A good poker set — complete with clay chips and playing cards that actually shuffle correctly — can making playing even at the kitchen table seem as good as Vegas (or Atlantic City, for you East coasters). And if you’re going to drop some coin on a poker set, you might as well go for the best.

We recommend The Opera Poker Set, available at Christopher’s Games of Quality and Distinction. This set will set (pardon the pun) you back a cool $500 … but practice your craft, and you’ll win that cash back in no time.

For something of an alternative, yet classic, set … try the River Boat Casino Poker Set ($210). Its Monte Carlo-style chips will add a bit of flair to your otherwise mundane breakfast nook.

For an added bonus, set up the card table in the garage with the door open. Let the breeze in and the smoke out.

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Photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ramberto/ / CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

Sure, we surf the Web on the clock … who doesn’t. But since we’re on our own clock here at The Man F.A.Q., there’s no boss to crack down. Here’s a little something we stumbled on today.

This one goes out to my buddy Tony. He used to say a line from this clip at work all the time. It always drew a chuckle from me.